


Family Values

by misura



Category: Caprica (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2015-12-18
Packaged: 2018-05-07 10:54:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5454065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misura/pseuds/misura
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or: three times Sam acted like an awesome big brother and one time he also acted like a cool uncle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Family Values

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_Plaid_Slytherin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Plaid_Slytherin/gifts).



.01

"She's _it_ , Sam," Yoseef said, and if he'd been drunk, if they'd _both_ been drunk, that would have been one thing. That would have been a thing Sam could have dealt with, laughed off. Teased Yoseef about in the morning, to distract them both from the hangover.

Unfortunately, they were both sober, or as sober as a man could be when he was all ja-lo-pei, the way Yoseef clearly was.

"The one." Yoseef shook his head. "Can you believe it?"

"I'm sure I can't," Sam said. "I mean, _you_? No offense, Yoseef, but if any one of us deserves to meet the love of their life, it surely must be me."

"It's not you, it's your terrible pick-up lines." Yoseef grinned.

Sam scowled. "Oh, thanks very much. Some brother you are." He wasn't bitter, not really. It helped that he knew, and Yoseef knew, that his pick-up lines were just fine.

So what if they were old, and cheesy, and the same ones everyone else was using? You didn't mess with the classics, was what.

"Family should be honest with each other," Yoseef said.

"Yeah? Then maybe I should go and have a little honest talk with my future sister-in-law. How'd that be, eh?" It'd be fair pay-back, in a way, for Yoseef trying to 'do him a favor' once or twice, talking him up to high Olympus and then some, only for Sam to ruin it all by _not_ being the gwa-lo-shon Yoseef'd made him out to be, with all his 'honest talk'.

'course, with Yoseef being Yoseef, Sam might just stick to the Gods' honest truth. Be more fair to everyone involved, too.

"Don't you dare," Yoseef said. "I'm warning you, Sam."

"You're warning me _not_ to talk to my future sister-in-law?"

"Her name is Laura."

"I know what her name is, Yoseef." Sam relaxed. They'd been having some very nice weather all week long; the Bucs were on a winning spree, and all three guys he'd given a talking to last week had behaved as they should, no need for Sam to come back and break something. Life was good, and if Yoseef had finally found himself a girl he could get serious about, then Sam, for one, didn't plan on doing anything to mess that up - unless it _needed_ messing up, of course. That was what the Gods created brothers for, after all.

"So," he asked, "does she know yours, too, or haven't you that far yet?"

"Frak you," Yoseef said, but he was smiling, so Sam figured it'd be okay to let that one go.

"Hey," Sam said, raising his hands, "just checking to see how long I have before I need to start planning your fa-loi."

"Soon," Yoseef said. "Very soon."

"Feeling pretty confident, eh? Bad luck, Yoseef. You know that. The Gods don't like it when man gets too arrogant and starts taking Their gifts for granted." Two things Sam did before any job: pray, and make a solid plan that allows for everything to turn to skor on him.

"I'm not taking anything for granted," Yoseef replied. "But yes, I feel pretty confident about this. _Confident_ , Sam. Not arrogant. Not complacent. I'm not expecting this to be _easy_."

_Why the frak not?_ Sam almost asked, because he'd _seen_ Yoseef with girls.

"It's just a pity she doesn't have a brother."

"That never works out anyway," Sam said. He never let that keep him from trying, naturally. No way to win the game if you weren't playing. Still, some days, a guy had to wonder if the Gods intended for him to die a li-so-poi, with only his loving brother to pay for his passage.

"It might if you got better pick-up lines."

 

.02

It was a proper Tauron wedding, of course: lots of booze, lots of dancing, lots of drunk people dancing.

Any moment now, someone was going to fall over in a hilarious way - face first into a bowl of refreshments, probably, and then the evening's festivities would be complete.

Until that moment came though, Sam figured he had a duty to fulfill as the groom's husband, and ho-la-ploi besides.

"Sam. You look nice."

Shannon looked more than nice. Brown suited her. "Only nice? Is _that_ why I can't seem to get your Cousin Ronnie to sit down next to me for more than five minutes?"

He held out his hand; she accepted. The musicians stuck up another traditional wedding song.

"No, that would be because Ronnie is shy and you intimidate him." Shannon smiled at him.

Yoseef could go on for hours about her dimples. "Me? I'm harmless."

"I know," Shannon said. "Still, given that you're here to tell me all the terrible things that you will do to me if I break your brother's heart, you might want to keep quiet about that."

"Hey now," Sam said. She was right: it _was_ tradition.

Shannon pulled him along with her in a spin. She was very good; to anyone who was watching, it probably looked like the move had been entirely Sam's own idea.

"All right, how's this?" They'd been to weddings on Tauron, him and Yoseef. They'd been very young; too young to really take part in any of it. "He fraks this up, you come to me, and we'll deal with it."

"Will he?" Shannon asked. "Frak this up?" She sounded serious.

Not a bad thing, per se. Marriage was a serious thing, a serious commitment. It didn't help, of course, that both bride and groom were expected to go to bed sober.

"Not if he knows what's good for him," Sam said. "Frak. He's a good guy. He's my brother. I love him."

"You're really not very good at this."

"I don't usually dance with women."

Shannon smiled at him again, and this time, for just a moment, he saw what Yoseef saw. "Neither does Ronnie. Try talking to him about the new MagLev line. He helped with the construction."

"You are a tsa-ri among women."

 

.03

"She's my little girl, Sam," Yoseef said, and Sam thought, _not so little anymore, these days_ because for all that nobody was stupid enough to even _look_ at Tamara the wrong way while Sam was with her, he was not an idiot.

He was also, thank the Gods, not her father.

"You want me to teach her some moves? Make any ko-prah who tries anything sorry he's alive? Consider it done." She'd probably even enjoy it, he thought.

"I want to _kill_ anyone who even _thinks_ about putting his hands on her."

"Well, that's probably going a bit far. Not that I don't understand the feeling, but ... " Sam shrugged. "You have to be reasonable about these things, Yoseef. One day, there's going to be a special boy. Or girl. That day comes, you're going to have to accept it."

"I know." Yoseef sounded decidedly less than happy about the prospect.

"You come see me, and we'll open up a bottle of wine, eh? The good stuff."

Yoseef glared at him. "Your sympathy is much appreciated, Sam."

"Don't mention it."

 

("Teach her how to shoot, too," Shannon said. "Just in case.")

("I'll ask her," Sam said. He hadn't mentioned guns to Yoseef. "She says 'no', that's it.")

("She's a smart girl, Sam," Shannon said. "She's not going to say 'no'. She's going to say 'yes', and one day, you're going to be so glad that she did.")


End file.
